Note from the Editor: You may already heard of the v,web xem sex online v important political parody Bridget Trump? The love child of Donald Trump and Bridget Jones has been gathering fans around the world with her hilarious tweets that are remarkably similar to a certain businessman turned POTUS.
SEE ALSO: Bridget Trump's Diary: I went to the Women's March and it was so overratedThe brainchild of British comic Tiff Stevenson, Bridget Trump, is obviously very, very busy. Miraculously she found the time to share a Valentine's diary entry with us. Here's how it went:
Gah! Another year of Valentine’s Day humiliation. No way will I get any cards. Toy with the idea of flirting energetically with anyone I think might be induced into sending me one, but dismiss as immoral. Instead I put the phone down on Malcolm Turnbull, fire off a couple of executive orders and listen to Elton John.
9.00 AM Nothing from Vlad, don’t even know if he is in the office today. Do they work Mondays in Russia?
9.15 AM Still nothing from Vlad
9.30 AM Oh god. Oh god. I thought that my romantic mini break with sex god Shinzo Abe at Mar-A Lago would make Vlad jealous…what if it is the opposite that is true?
10.05 AM Heart gave great lurch when I saw Vlad had been online! It was the official Kremlin account but still he is in the office and hasn’t been in touch. Maybe it was because last time we spoke I accused him of cheating and he called me a frigid cow.
10.30 AM Could this day be any longer? I have a huge pile of folders and tedious security briefings to look through but I just can’t bring myself to do it.
11.30 AM God I am bored.
11.45 AM Finding inner peace by reminding myself just how many enthusiastic supporters there were lining the streets of Florida. Some of them were so old and tanned. It is important that I note these small victories, as outlets such as CNN refuse to! Very dishonest of them.
Anyway Valentine’s Day is a purely commercial, cynical enterprise anyway. Matter of supreme indifference to me, a bit like SNL.
Wherefore art thou Vlad? Credit: Shutterstock / MediaGroup_BestForYou Valentines Day Massacre.
Not to be confused with the Bowling Green Massacre which is definitely a real thing!!!
8 AM Oh goody. Valentine’s Day. Wonder if the post has come yet. Go downstairs in my dressing gown, it is definitely NOT a bathrobe. Maybe there will be a card from Vlad. Or a secret admirer!! Maybe Nigel? Quite excited actually.
9 AM Brief moment of wild joy when I see a bunch of flowers in the Oval Office. Read the card and I see they have been sent to Michelle, the former tenant. I put them in the bin. It’s fine. I am a poised POTUS and do not need validation from bad men and criminals.
Lunch
Emergency summit with urban family. Kellyanne is really upset over accidentally plugging Ivanka’s products on Fox. She accused Fox of emotional fuckwittage. We agreed that me not receiving any flowers or cards from Vlad was just an alternate fact. Cheers to that!
Cocktails: 3 (a bit naughty for lunch time)
6 PM Everyone is leaving the office early for dinner dates. Just myself and Sean left. He is chewing Orbit cinnamon constantly and driving me mad. I tell him to leave and on his way out he steps on something weird. It’s a red envelope. He considers calling the security team in for a sweep but I grab it off him. Then I get so nervous I pass it back to him and he reads it out.
‘A piece of ridiculous and meaningless commercial exploitation - for my darling little frigid cow’.
I let out a massive yelp and the Secret Service come rushing in. I shout ‘I Bridget Trump am a sex goddess once again!!’ and we all just fell about with laughter.
Tiff Stevenson (a.k.a. Bridget Trump) is on tour from now until May 5, including two shows at London’s Bloomsbury Theatre on Feb. 24 and 25. More information: http://tiffstevenson.co.uk
Assembling a DIY PC Speaker System
U.S. Vice President Kamala Harris just joined TikTok. Here's how to watch her content.
Two adorable, newly discovered Yoda
How to watch Kristen Stewart in A24's 'Love Lies Bleeding': Where is it streaming?
8 worst dating app icks, ranked
Lego deals: Grab the Pixar 'Up' House for $47 at Amazon
Jake Gyllenhaal throws serious shade at Trump's treatment of the environment
Faith Kipyegon Paris 2024 livestream: Watch live athletics for free
I choose to believe that Hillary Clinton wants 'Truth Hurts' to be the national anthem
Wordle today: The answer and hints for July 26
Spotify Wrapped 2023 is here: 5 exciting new features
Trump's intel agencies tell Congress that climate change poses national security threats
Senate Defiance Act passes unanimously, outlining civil path for deepfake victims
Explore your future climate using this slick interactive tool, while you still can
The mannequin head meme has Twitter shaking
NYT's The Mini crossword answers for July 25
'Kamala' versus 'Harris': The internet weighs in on sexism in politics
The surprising place life on Earth could have started 3.5 billion years ago
Футболист Тюкавин высказался об игре CS2
Huge rotting sea creature that washed ashore is horrifyingly turning the water red
The biggest trend at CES was sleeping through CESPenguin jumps into man's boat for a quick hiWoman pretends to give birth to her kitten in hilariously weird cat maternity photo shootOprah asks the big question looming over Time's Up: Now what?'This place is a shithole' projection appears on Donald Trump's D.C. hotelBeautiful Australian Shepherd is high as a kite and doesn't care about anythingIt was only a matter of time: The Tide Pod doughnut is bornEmotional couple held a touching funeral for their fishTide Pods locked up at stores as internet challenge goes too farPhiladelphia goes wild after the Eagles make it to the Super Bowl Apple iMac: The Computer That Saved the Company SpaceX's ninth Starship test flight ends in another explosion Best gift for kids deal: National Geographic Rock Tumbler Kit on sale for $19 off at Amazon So... You Want to Become a Penetration Tester? Watch the moment SpaceX Starship crushed a major milestone in latest test Essential Apps to Install on Windows and macOS Best early Prime Day deal: Save 40% on the Ember Mug at Amazon War Stories Will the Milky Way and Andromeda crash? Now scientists aren't so sure. Foldable iPhone leaks tease new details on camera, specs, display
1.9143s , 10189.6015625 kb
Copyright © 2025 Powered by 【web xem sex online】Enter to watch online.How I, Bridget Trump, became a Valentine's Day sex goddess,
